Hello, my name is Katie, and I'm a Screamer!

You win some. You lose some. And sometimes you do both in the same day.

As a mom, one of my biggest faults is that I tend to be a "screamer." If you're a mom, I'm sure you've been there. Little pint-sized bundles of sass push and push until you reach your boiling point.

As of late, my eldest has been in the habit of completely ignoring my requests. Just flat-out, complete disregard for what I'm saying. Don't get me wrong. He's a great kid. Sweet as apple pie and he wears his heart on his sleeve. But, when it comes to pushing my buttons, he's got my number! I've tried a million strategies to discipline: timeouts, counting, rewarding, taking things away, and, yes, even the last resort...spanking. Sometimes one of these strategies works, sometimes none of them do. Regardless, I have yet to find something that works on a consistent basis...cue the screaming. I've been so frustrated lately with the circus our home has become, that I've resorted to screaming - hoping that the louder and more forceful I speak, the better both of my children will listen. Following a big blow-out, I always have the good old fashioned Catholic guilt. "I'm a terrible mother," "I'm destroying their little personalities," "I need to have more patience!" are just some of the thoughts that pass through my mind.

Typically, I'm pushed to my boiling point when we're on a schedule. We need to be somewhere by a certain time, and my little gentlemen just aren't cooperating. How many times does a mother need to say "Put on your shoes!" before someone hears her?! Mostly I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall. Like, a 20 feet tall brick wall, made of solid concrete foundation block.

Such was the experience last week, when I was on my own for the morning (no daddy), and needed to get my oldest to preschool. The entire morning was a freakin' clown show. Just trying to get the two of them dressed was like trying to wrangle monkeys on crack. By the time we had made our way to coats and shoes, I was done. It came spewing out of my mouth like hot lava from a volcano. Thank GOD no one else was around because it must have looked a little freaky. I was stomping my feet, balling my fists and screaming like a toddler myself. Afterwards, my four-year-old looked at me with fear in his eyes and started balling that "I want my daddy." Stick a knife in my chest and twist, because I had just FAILED as a mom. Ugh... Later, as I was driving home from the preschool drop-off, I even tried to convince myself that it really wasn't that big of a deal. My mom had been a screamer (sorry Mom!) and I think I turned out ok. I don't have any unresolved self-esteem issues. I have an excellent relationship with my mom -  we're very good friends and I love her to pieces. I feel like I'm living a pretty happy life with a loving husband and two beautiful children. Maybe screaming isn't as bad as everyone makes it out to be. And then I ran across the following articles...

Study Says Yelling Is As Hurtful As Hitting: 
Parents Who Yell At Teens Can Increase Risk of Depression and Aggression

Parents - Are You A Yeller?

As the title of the first article suggests, a recent study published in Child Development, found there to be a correlation between yelling and depression/aggression. The study specifically targeted children between the ages of 13 and 14, though I can't help but think the same would ring true for any child subjected to yelling, even at a young age. As I read this article, I was taken back to my post-preschool drop-off pep talk. "My mom had been a screamer and I think I turned out ok." Maybe not. You see, as a teen, and throughout most of my adulthood, I have struggled with depression. It's also something that runs deep in our family and is known to be genetic. So there's that. But maybe, just maybe, it had something to do with yelling. I decided right there in that moment that I would try to make a change.

As mentioned before, I'm Catholic. It's currently the time of year that we Catholic's do best: Lent. Traditionally, we give up something during this time to reflect on the 40 days and 40 nights that Jesus spent in the dessert fasting. In the past, I typically "do" something instead of "give up" something. By Tuesday, the day I ran across these little articles, and 20 days into Lent, I still hadn't made a commitment to my own Lenten sacrifice. So here it is: for the remaining days leading up to Easter, I resolve to give up yelling. Of any kind. That was Tuesday. It is now Friday and so far I have been 100% successful. And you know what? - it is making a HUGE difference! I also discovered a little technique that my four-year-old's preschool teacher uses. Counting, with the addition of the child's name. For instance, "Billy, stop hitting your brother. Billy-one, Billy-two, Billy-three..." My son's preschool teacher must be a genius, because it works every.single.time. My oldest HATES it when I use his name while counting, and has started ceasing his behavior as soon as I start the mantra. So, between not yelling and the name+counting, I've found a strategy I can live with.

Again, this morning I tackled the preschool duty alone, and we had a great morning! We made it out the door on time, perhaps even a bit early! The three of us had a great little conversation on the way to school and as I walked out of the preschool after kissing my son goodbye, I felt my heart swell to the size of a beach ball. It felt really, really good to have had a scream-free morning! Following preschool drop-off, was a successful Target run with my two-year-old. We usually leave Target in a crying, screaming fit (him, not me) and today with a little creative thinking to ward off the tantrums, we made it through without incident. I can't help but think that the scream-free parenting set the tone for the day and laid the foundation for happier, more relaxed children.

After the post-preschool pickup today I was feeling so confident that I decided on an eat-in lunch date. Both children, at a semi-sitdown restaurant for lunch, alone. Was I crazy? Or was it some kind of scream-free high? We got in line to order our sandwiches and my youngest immediately knocked over one of the display signs. Then, they both proceeded to run around the line like banshees. Finally, the oldest mocked a death complete with air gasping, and a slow fall to the floor where he lay with his arms and legs sprawling and his tongue hanging out of his mouth. In the middle of the restaurant. Right between a college-aged couple who was giving me the stink-eye and a middle-aged man who smiled with understanding. After getting our sandwiches we sat down at a table, and in a fit of rage to get to the chocolate milk first, my youngest knocked the bottle of milk out of my hands, sending milk cascading all over the floor. And...end scene.

Yup. That's my life in a nutshell. Tiny little moments of success followed by giant catastrophes. But I'm sticking to the "no yelling" pledge. It may not make our lives completely perfect, but I think it's making a difference. Previously I would yell because I was frustrated and I thought it would help blow off some steam. But I think it did the opposite. I think it actually made me more stressed. So giving it up has actually brought a little calmness to my crazy life. If you doubt me, and you're a screamer, I challenge you to try it for a week. I promise, Mom's Honor, you and your kids won't be disappointed.



Side note: A friend of mine once recommended a book that I have yet to read - it's on my "to-do list." Maybe you want to give it a try too. It's called "Scream Free Parenting: The Revolutionary Approach to Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool" by Hal Edward Runkel. 

The Product of Persuasion

If you've noticed during my last few posts that my photography seems a bit rudimentary, it's because for the last several weeks I have been without my baby. My Nikon D3100 that is. Yup...there are models out there that far surpass the ability of my humble little DSLR. But I love her and I had a really hard time convincing my husband to see the value in making said purchase. 

So, imagine my dismay (and the argument that ensued) when our new dog (who was also the subject of a little spousal persuasion) pulled my baby off the end table with her teeth. Unfortunately, the camera was damaged and took nothing but black pictures. Off to Nikon she was shipped and, $150 later, she is back. It was like Christmas morning waiting for the UPS delivery today. Oh how I have missed her. Welcome home, sweetie!

Just in time for a photography class that is scheduled for next weekend. Which, by the way, was rescheduled today for MAY, due to the weather. It's an outdoor photography class. You would think that it would be safe to schedule an outdoor photography class at the beginning of April. But...it's Iowa. The land of what is shaping up to be The Eternal Winter. 

Round Peg, Square(ish) Home

If I had a theme song for today's post it would be "Happy" by Pharrell Williams. In fact, here's a link to the song on YouTube just in case you'd like to play it while you read.

There's just something about little things that make me grin. It's probably why the most satisfying projects I work on are for kids. Think about it - nearly everything, when made miniature sized, is just plain adorable. Ok...so maybe not everything (like probably not doggie poo or roadkill), but an awful lot anyway.

A few years back, we decided to do a little remodeling in our master bedroom, and as a result, reduced the number of dressers we needed. The chest of drawers remain, but the other piece retired to the basement. It currently houses a stereo, TV and some of the kids' toys. One of the bottom drawers was broken so I replaced both with some storage boxes from Ikea I had previously used in our toy room. Don't judge...it's an unfinished basement!

The other drawer, which was in really great shape, has been hanging out with the piles of laundry near the washing machine for the past two years. And, no, it has not been the same pile of laundry for the past two years. Just the same drawer, in the same place, collecting dust. It was a great size and I knew someday I would come up with an excellent new purpose for it. And this week I did - the excellent new purpose - a doll house!

I must admit it is one of my FAVORITE projects to date. Why? Because it includes some teeny tiny little peg people, miniature furniture and tiny little accessories. Little, itty bitty morsels of happiness.

It was a pretty simple project. A little time consuming, but easily done in bits and pieces. I started by building the room dividers out of scrap plywood and 2x5s. After attaching the "walls" to the "second floor," I ran a small bead of glue along each edge that would touch the drawer frame, and then tacked it with finishing nails from the outside. After filling all of the nail and screw holes, I painted the entire piece white.

To furnish the house, I raided our scrap wood bin again and pieced together anything that could resemble furniture, then pawed through a supply of scrapbooking paper I inherited from a friend of my mom's. I hit the jackpot when I found a whole kit of coordinating paper that also included little embellishments that I could use for wall art and accessories in the house.

I modge podged paper for the accent walls in each room and on some of the furniture for accents. Finally, I modge podged the accessories and wall art on top of that.

For the inhabitants of this home, I discovered wooden peg people while perusing Pinterest for some inspiration. I found the pegs at Hobby Lobby in the unfinished wood section. They also make smaller pegs to use for children, but I wasn't sure I could tackle painting on something soooooo tiny. But man, they sure could be cute! Since they're all the same size, either my peg family is a little unconventional...or the kids are really tall. But we're using our imaginations here folks, so just go with it! I used Sharpie Paint (oil-based) markers to paint the people. The Sharpie Paints are MUCH easier to maneuver than a paint brush so it was fairly easy to get the lines straight and the details just right. Still a little sketchy, but I think they're cute nevertheless.

And here they are...a happy little family in a happy little home.

I love them to pieces. It's going to be hard to see this one go.

If at first you don't succeed...

Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been 23 days since my last blog post. I'll say three Hail Mary's. On my knees...

Over the last several weeks I've been gearing up for the Little Prairie Girl Barn Sale happening on Friday, April 11 and Saturday, April 12. If you've never been - it's a MUST! A woman by the name of Natalie Meester turned her good old Iowa dairy barn into a gift shop. On occasion from Spring through late Fall, she hosts Vintage Market Barn Sales. The loft of the barn, along with the adjacent Hen House and Machine Shed, are transformed into vendor space for local shops and individuals to showcase their talents. The focus? Repurposing, antiques and more.

Natalie Meester and her husband.
www.facebook.com/LittlePrairieGirl

Little Prairie Girl Gift Shop
www.facebook.com/LittlePrairieGirl 

Be there or be square!

I had been thinking about submitting an application (it's a juried sale) for sometime and on a whim I decided to contact Natalie to see if there was still space. Much to my surprise, I was accepted with open arms. So far, I'm only committed to the April show. I'm hoping to make enough to, at least, break even. Anything beyond that would be an added bonus. At first I was worried about filling my humble 10'x10' space and now I'm beginning to get a bit concerned about how I'll manage to haul all of the AWESOME finds I have stumbled across in the last month. Thank goodness my husband bought a trailer awhile back for his electrical company. Unbeknownst to him, I was secretly doing mental cartwheels at the thought of all of the "junk" I could scavenge with that trailer! Today while we were perusing Menard's he bought more bungees and tie downs and said they were "for me." I think he may be on to me.  But, YEAH, for bungees!

Anyhoo...back to my preparation for the sale. A few of the projects I've been working on include some seasonal Easter decor, a small dresser/nightstand in the most amazing shade of turquoise, a recycled crib bench and some glorious accessories in shades of pink, orange, red, yellow, antique white and hints of grey. I found inspiration in this amazing fabric and these adorable little Easter eggs.

Can't wait to share everything I've been tackling!

I love the feeling I get after I finish a project. Most times I stand back and I'm just tickled with the results. Giddy, in fact - like a crafting high. Or, maybe it's all of those paint, glue and stain fumes I've been sniffing. I did have turquoise boogers the other day from all of the spray paint that undoubtedly made it's way into my lungs. Hmmm... So, usually there's a lot of giddiness, and then, on occasion, there are those epic fails. I had one of those fails this week. Luckily, the only thing it cost me was time and a few dollars.

I've been working on a small child's table that I converted from a sad looking end table. The top was pretty beat up so I sanded it down and talked my father-in-law into letting me use his shop for some re-staining (because it's heated and the weather here is still freezing ass cold). He assisted with a couple of coats - it took three! After some additional help from Annie Sloan for the legs, I was ready to decoupage a sweet little vintage ABCs poster to the top. It was my first attempt at a large-scale decoupage and let me tell you that anyone who says it's easy is either a. lying or b. LYING! The paper bubbled, warped and looked just plain AWFUL after it was permanently attached to the top of my beautifully stained table. This project had just earned a big fat 'F' for 'FAIL!' After scraping off what I could by hand, I introduced the top to a belt sander. Bye bye, beautiful stain. Ugh... And now the big question, what to do with the top?! The poster was one of a kind (but luckily only $1.50 at Goodwill). I didn't want a run-of-the-mill painted top and I didn't really want to take the time to stain it yet again. And then - AH-HA - the solution! Chalkboard paint - and I happen to already have some on hand for a couple of other projects. So...now something that looked really awful and elementary, looks classy enough for any playroom. A+

After a bit of meditation, I realized this little lesson in crafting says a whole lot about life, too. We all know the saying, "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again." But should we keep "trying" the same strategy over and over until we get it right? If we really aren't good at baseball should we just keep playing baseball until we make our way to mediocre? Or should we maybe try football or tennis? And maybe we went to college for a certain field and we get our first job, but we don't really love it. Should we keep trying the same job, in the same field over and over until we find the position that makes us just kind of happy? Or should we dig deep and ask ourselves what we're passionate about and perhaps change direction? I'm not sure I know the answer, and I'm not saying we should change direction simply because our first try wasn't successful, but maybe we shouldn't be so afraid of a little change either. After my little end table lesson I now like to say, "If at first you don't succeed, maybe, just maybe, you need to change your plan." Oh yeah and there's this little takeaway too. Everything, even really big, epic fails, can be fixed. Even if it means you need a really big belt sander to remove a few layers of the crap to get back to the good stuff.

Keep Calm & Eat Cupcakes

And the hits just keep on comin'! It is the first day of March, and we are currently under assault. The snow and cold just won't seem to stop this winter. We've already seen 2-3 inches of snow in the last 12 hours and by the end of tonight the forecasters are expecting an additional 5 inches of accumulation. Oh - and the kicker - tonight's forecast is for -10, which will feel like -28.

WHAT?! It is March, right?

I'm beginning to wonder if it will EVER get warm again. I feel a bit like I did in my ninth month of pregnancy. I was never one of those women who take pregnancy in stride. I had nearly every side effect known to man (er...woman), and I remember feeling like the discomfort would never cease - that I would be pregnant for-ever! Logically speaking, of course, I knew it wasn't possible to be eternally preggers. And, I'll go out on a limb here and say that I doubt there's ever been evidence of a woman who's pregnant state was never-ending. Nevertheless, I couldn't help but think that I would never see a light at the end of the tunnel.

This winter has catapulted me into that same state of mind. When it hasn't been snowing, it's been freezing ass cold. Yes, that's a technical term for so cold it could freeze your butt off. My kids have been bouncing off the walls, nearly killing each other with their pent-up energy. I've been hiding away in my basement or sewing closet like a hobbit, grasping for anything that might help me keep my sanity: a paint brush, needle and thread, or more often than not, Girl Scout cookies - by the row. And my poor husband - he works most of his days in the elements and is beginning to wither from the daily layering of clothes, hand-warmers, heated insoles and frozen lunches. Will it ever end? Are we entering a second Ice Age? I'm beginning to wonder. I mean, it has to get warmer one of these days. Right? Right?!

On the upside - today is my birthday and I had a cupcake.

Stay warm friends.